Friday, 3 February 2017

Chapter 63 - This Thing Called Science

Dad died for the first time
Death watched a bit of TV

I'm not going to deny it.  The place was intimidating.  It was huge.  Huge and suspiciously located a long way out of town.  I had been given some amazing new clothes to wear though and already I felt like a scientist and I hadn't even rattled any atoms yet!

My, how do they clean those windows?
I was met in the entrance hall by a derpy woman who smiled in a fake way before talking into the telephone.  I say talking into rather than answering because, since the removal of all land based lines there was no way there was anyone on the end of her desk phone. 

I wasn't sure if I applauded her choice in artwork or was disturbed by it. But I decided that anyone who actively chose to have a picture of a rocket ship blasting from a gorilla version of the Statue of Liberty on their wall was someone who defiantly thought outside of the box.

And she appeared to be well outside of her box.

I left her happily babbling into the phone and made my way through into the heart of the laboratory.

Hello?  Candyland?  I'd like to order a pizza from the moon.
Inside I was met with another level of brilliance.

I think.

I'm new around here.  Could you tell me what I should be doing? Errmmm? Hello? Are you ok?
Soon, soon I will have enough custard to start phase two of my plan..

He seemed to be well clear of most boxes as well and I began to question exactly the kind of person that worked here.  I couldn't get many clear answers out of him either.  When I finally got him even aware of my presence, he looked at me like I was something he was dreaming about.  He stared silently, before jumping up, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and stuffing a crystal into my pocket.  His eyes darted from side to side, placed a finger on his lips and scurried away.

I fear I may have been committed without realising it.

Some rooms, however, left me baffled!?
I took it upon myself to work out what was going on.  Most of the rooms seemed to have a specific function.  They contained analysers, chemistry equipment or were designed for recreation and food.

Outside there was a rocket waiting to be constructed.  It looked a lot like the one we had at home and I was surprised that a commercially available rocket ship would be the apparent top-of-the-range.  I would have expected this place to have something far more impressive!

I decided that I would get on with that at a later date.  With all my experience at home it should be a doddle.
Oh Plumbob!

I attempted to use some of the equipment.  I think I am going to need a lot more practice before I get anything meaningful.  I discovered a few elements but I think that was more an accident than any kind of intelligent application on my part.

Trouble is, in order to be taken seriously here, I have to have breakthroughs.  Doesn't matter what as long as they are new and different.  They don't even need to be FOR anything as long as they LOOK like they might be.

I did find what I think is possibly the most fun thing I have ever found though.  It's like a 3D printer on steroids.  There's a manual interface and then this kind of robot head that spins around and does the actual work but you can communicate your ideas directly with it!
This is going to be THE most awesome basket for the Easter Egg Hunt!!

I absolutely love the thing.  Although I am a little concern at the fire power it appears to possess.  But as long as it doesn't go all H.A.L on us I think we should be fine.


I even made my first breakthrough on it!  (Ok, Ok.  I had the actual breakthrough beforehand, but I was on the toilet at the time.  Give a dude a break!)

I spent most of the morning pottering around with it and with a great deal of help from H.A.L I finally turned my idea into reality.


Isn't it gloriously unnecessary?!

Perfect balance of pointlessness and inferred usefulness.

Ahhh..... I truly am one of the people now.

Brown House
After I grabbed a snack from a vending machine in the far corner of the facility, only to find out that the only microwave was at the opposite end, I decided to check out the greenhouse. 

I have no idea what they plan to do in this place but I have to admit that once again I was sensationally underwhelmed by the place.  Obviously there are no government grants for creepy, backwater science places with mentally abstract employees.

Green House
I decided that something had to be done.  So I spent the afternoon adding a few bits and bobs to make the place more...

It looked much better, even if I do say so myself and I have left some space for if, and when, we need it to grow some sciency tomatoes or radioactive plums or whatever!

I think I am going to enjoy it here.  It certainly is quiet and my work colleagues seem to be happy to just live and let live without the need for 'socialising' and 'enforced fun'.  

At least at the moment.

This...does not look good!

Dad died for the second time when I got home.

1 comment:

  1. LOL...what fun! I love the way you tell a story :D Poor Dad! I love the science career and even more because of your story. Looking forward to more!