Wednesday 21 October 2015

Chapter 11 - Rock, Fat Girl, Rock!



"I call this one Mary Had A Little Shotgun"

So, pregnant as I was I decided that I shouldn't sit on my laurels.  I decided to get myself a hobby.  After trying roller blading, cordless bungee jumping and scuba diving, I settled on the guitar.  And to be honest I am actually enjoying it.

"Twang!  Wait! I'll get it! Twang!  Nope!  Hang On!"

I have been playing at every opportunity, even to walls!  I am slowly improving and soon I will be a mega star!  Oh yeah!  I am totally owning this self improvement crap!

"Dolly says Heres a Stinker"

Another strange thing seems to be happening around the house.  Perhaps its just my hormones playing up but everywhere I look there are dirty dishes!  Does no one in this house wash up!  I believe this statement to be true as yesterday I caught Pawl eating cereal from a jug because, apparently, there were no clean dishes.  Umm.... I can think of a great solution to that Einstien!


"I see your slobbiness!"

"On the BOOKSHELF!!!"


"Seriously!? And what is this creepy doll doing in my house!"


"Suds"

In the end there was only one thing for it.  Wash them myself.  I am fat and sweaty and my bottom is turning triangular but still I have to wash up.  It sucks to be me right now.  But after my whirlwind of cleanliness through the house I am satisfied that we are no longer under threat from homegrown deadly lifeforms so I decide to reward myself with a trip out to the garden.  I do love my little garden.  I don't know whats growing here, the packets didn't have labels but I am sure they are going to be amazing!

"Oh look, this ones got legs!"

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